Self-Image

For the majority of the past year I've felt fairly good about what I look like. I know I am not anywhere near where I want to be, but I usually feel very confident. I don't feel like I'm trying to hide my stomach too much. But the other day I realized maybe I should be. I was dressing for an interview and looked in the mirror to see the side view. Not too bad. Until I realized it's because I was using near perfect posture. When I slouch ever so slightly, which is what I'm sure I do in normal everyday life, I could see how someone would think I was pregnant. I've always carried all the extra weight in a perfect little stomach pouch. Everywhere else is fairly balanced, except for my stomach. So now I'm annoyed that I don't look as decent as I thought I have for the last year. I think I'm fooling myself to see what I want to see. I'm not seeing the reality. I think this is why people don't realize they are overweight. We still see ourselves 20+ pounds ago.

Unfortunately, I know from experience that the same issues occurred when I lost weight. I never saw myself as 35 pounds lighter. I can see it now that I look back in photos. Maybe this is why people become overweight so easily and get so discouraged when losing weight. Our self-image takes too long to catch up with reality.

I've also realized that since Thursday, I haven't been on plan at all. I haven't exercised or tracked any of my food. Which isn't the right approach, because I know it will only make me more frustrated to see a gain on the scale Wednesday. I already feel sluggish from being so off track. I'm going to give myself the next week and half to get back on track, so no weigh-in this week. Although, I will be weighing myself daily because I haven't done that the last few days either because I was avoiding the truth.

I'm also going to figure out how to help myself see the reality as I lose weight. I'm very fearful of losing over 30 pounds again and not giving myself credit for it.